Category: funny shit

Regular

vmohlere:

tigerliliesandcherryblossoms:

tetsuskitten:

infinityonthot:

fangoddess817:

endreams-s:

writing-prompt-s:

A dating service where matching is based on people’s search history exists. You’re a serial killer. You go on a date with a writer.

Serial Killer: metaphorically, if you were to kill someone, how would you do it?

Writer: Air shot between the toes, it’ll look like a heart attack.

Serial Killer who is obviously in love already: *sucks in a breath* ok

Writer: how long would it take to die if you were to potentially stab someone in the guts

Serial killer: anywhere from 2 to 30 minutes

Writer, already bringing a ring out: *shaking* thanks

A++ addition

Writer: *shows the serial killer the murder scene they’re writing* babe, i’m not sure if this would actually work?

Serial killer: *kisses writer on the forehead and leaves, comes back later, a suspicious scent of blood coming off them* it works baby, you’re doing great

I LOVE THIS

Oh no, murder comedy is my jam

Let’s see what Laurie’s got.

Pastor Dave: Six.
Pastor Dave: Six.
Pastor Dave: Six.
Laurie:
Pastor Dave:
Laurie:
Pastor Dave: Well thank you all for a lovely evening I’ll see you at church.

Regular

slapmytitties:

What if instead of having sirens ambulances just played move bitch get out the way by ludacris

Regular

woegarden:

i had the funniest fucking dream i was hanging out with michael jackson and someone asked him what his pronouns were and he said “he/hee!” and i woke up crying

Regular

iamfuckingweeping:

non-binary-sally-bowles:

You’ve been hit by 🔪

You’ve been struck by 🔪

A Roman Senator 🔪🔪🔪

CAESER ARE YOU OKAY

ARE YOU OKAY CEASER

*chokes on laughter and tries hard to ignore spelling errors*

Regular

2edge4u:

animatedamerican:

starlightomatic:

“mood” is basically the equivalent of “amen”

and now I am picturing an entire congregation solemnly intoning “big mood”

“May the Lord be with you.”

“Bitch you too the fuck!”

I legit just choked…

Photo

Photo

stubbornseedling: peppapigvevo: xoxo-gossip-g…

stubbornseedling:

peppapigvevo:

xoxo-gossip-gay:

weallneedsomethingtobelievein:

debonairbexar:

thefingerfuckingfemalefury:

cydonianmystery:

N U N   R A V E

BLESS THIS MOSH PIT

“Drop the blessed bass sister Mary Bethel!”

I’m not gonna lie, this made my night.

I thought this gonna be young ravers dressed as nuns but nope. they nuns.

I’m the nuns doing the macarena

This is the original/actual footage of the music they’re really dancing too, and while at first I was like ‘aw man I was wishing the first post was legit that was awesome,’ this is actually super adorable too.

I legit want to be these nuns…

yesbothways:

yesbothways:

@holmesianpose

vittyyluvscookies: unsolicited disney

vittyyluvscookies:

unsolicited disney